Do you care about 2052?
Welcome to the Schmoozeletter Blog. Your source for weekly water cooler wisecracks from the world of finance. If you have an opinion different than mine or a topic you want to hear about, let me know!
This week, the market is saved!
What a difference a week makes.
Good inflation data came in, and Mr. Market went flying right back up.
Your portfolio and precious crypto rebounded with a vengeance. Angels sang on high. Uncured diseases magically disappeared. Soldiers laid down their arms and broke bread with enemies. Weather boy nerds grew eight inches to the average male height. Some of this is true.
All because—let’s see who remembers their notecards from last week:
Lower inflation = More likely to cut interest rates = Market goes up.
This played out in real time Wednesday morning. The Federal Reserve dropped their CPI data at exactly 8:30 a.m. Wednesday. This is public information that hits the internet in a bunch of places, but I like watching on Investing.com’s economic calendar. Take a look-see:
Good inflation data comes in, and the S&P 500 shoots up like a rocket.
What is good inflation data? Apparently, it is one-tenth of one percentage point below what is forecasted.
Does one-tenth of one percentage point really make any difference over the long term? Of course not! But billions of dollars really do move around in minutes based on whether we are one-tenth of one percentage point below or one-tenth of one percentage point above the numbers some dudes expect it to be. Fun stuff!
We also had the Supreme Court saying that a Chinese app created by a “for-profit” company needs to sell for tens of billions of dollars or instead make zero in the U.S. The communists must like Howie’s remaining briefcases because they’re saying, “NO DEAL!”
But don’t worry, TikTokers—Trump said after the ruling that the final decision will be up to him. Trump also said, “FUCK THE PLANET.”
Pssssssh. 27 years? That will never get here.
Not for Donny at least. He makes it clear he’s about the now; the future can figure itself out.
But do you care about 2052?
I ask because the biggest news of the week is that on the day of the inaugural Crypto Ball headlined by financial aficionado Snoop Dogg, President-Sell-You-Shit launched his very own meme coin.
He actually calls it a meme coin. Like, I am not even saying President-Sell-You-Shit in jest. He will be president come Monday, and meme coins are, by definition, shit.
It is such shit that, in order to buy it, you need to sign a waiver saying:
1. You know it’s not an investment.
2. You will not sue.
And unsurprisingly, just like all the shit that Donny shovels, the American public ATE IT UP.
“Big Don has got more shit for us?!”
Which brings me back to my question:
Do you care about 2052?
More specifically, do you want your portfolio optimized for 2052?
As cryptonians and DJT investors chase gains for the short term, here at the Schmoozeletter we are long-term investors. Our goal isn’t gains for this year or the next four years; it’s gains for the next forty years.
So I’m throwing down the gauntlet. I’m putting up my best stocks of 2052 vs. your beloved tokens and hype picks. All my stocks are real companies that I own and have detailed on here. In 27 years, we’ll meet back up and see who had a higher total return.
See you in 27 years.
Final Thought
A good long-term investing approach is one where you don’t buy shit.
